A Guarantee is Nothing More than a Statement Saying the Product is, in Fact, Defective - and They'll Take Care of It Later

How many "one's" can there be? I think back to the men I've dated, which happens to be a lot (some I'm not so proud of). But I think back to some of the ones that were good and if I could see myself married to them.

I can pretty much picture exactly what my life would be like with most of them. And a couple of them wouldn't have been so bad. So then the question begs, how long do I wait to find something better than "so bad"? I look at the marriages around me today and they're not so bad either. And the ones that were "so bad" and ended, I couldn't have predicted that it would become that way and end. Can you really know someone well enough to fool-proof a marriage?

Maybe I just have a fairy-tale image of marriage in my mind. Maybe what I imagine marriage to be just doesn't exist anymore. There are no guarantees in marriage. Nothing saying that if you meet someone great that they won't change in five years time to be someone you never would've gotten involved with in the first place. But then what? Say you have 2 children with them and they just don't want that life anymore. There's nothing you can do to change their mind. They changed on their own and they'll leave the same way.

Could I have made it work (in a marriage) with some of my ex-boyfriends? Absolutely. Would I have been happy, living a fulfilled life? Maybe, but I probably would've wondered what life would've been like if I had waited for "the one."

I guess I'm questioning this now because I'm in negotiations with 2 former boyfriends, and wondering what it's worth. I know them both very well. One I have more confidence in than the other. They both have their strengths and weaknesses when it comes to relationships. I've also just met 2 other new guys. (This is how my life goes. Either it's a dry spell or a flood. No in between.) It doesn't feel right to string any of them along, but I don't want to make any hasty decisions either.

So, I ask myself what I need. I already know what I want, but that's not necessarily what I'll get. Again, I ask myself what I need in a relationship. I could spend my entire life looking for someone to fulfill my every want and desire, but I'm either going to end up alone or putting pressure on someone to be that way forever. Am I setting myself up for failure if I do that? Everyone is human and makes mistakes. If I'm looking for the perfect man, I may as well be wishing on a star. There is no perfect man. There is no guarantee that I won't end up alone - with or without a man.

I just want to be enough for someone. I want them to enjoy being with me, living life to the fullest with me, and eventually raising children with me. I'd say that he would have to love me, but I will say that I need to feel loved by him instead. My perception of being loved may be different than his. Some of the things I once looked for in a husband/partner aren't really things I need. I'm banking too many things on a person that will inevitably let me down at some point. I want a lot of things out of life, and none of them require one specific person. Similar interests - yes, caring and loving - yes, unlike anyone I've ever met - no.

SONG OF THE DAY: "You're Not Alone" by Meredith Andrews
My only guarantee for love is in the Lord. With Him, I'll never be alone. I'll never be without. This life on earth is only a temporary home. The one I spend it with now won't matter in heaven. I could spend another 5-10 years trying to find the right one, get married, and then die the next day. What good is waiting for the right one on earth when it's only temporary and only right for a moment. They're not the one I live my life for anyway. There's only one that really matters; only one with a guarantee. He is perfection; with Him, I'll always be loved. I won't die without a man, but I will perish without God.