Online Ambience

I'm quite versed when it comes to online dating. I've tried almost all of the websites, or so I thought. I came across a new one tonight.

It's called Brainiac Dating. Free Membership! Well, so they say. I didn't sign up. There slogan is "Where It's Sexy to be Smart." I got a kick out of it.

My favorite part of the website was playing the quizzes. I did well at the flower, movie, and art quiz. I would have to say an honorable mention should go to the tree quiz though.

I don't know the ins and outs of this site (like the others), but I may check it out at some point. It seemed interesting. "Find smart singles."

I worry if they have a "dumb" people dating site. (So, I just Googled it and I won't repeat what it came up with. I'm quite confused actually. I wouldn't use the word "dumb" to classify that dating site. Is that PC?)

Anyway, it seems they have a dating website for all kinds of people - even a couple if you aren't interested in dating monogamously but are into extra-curricular activities - if you get my drift. Never been a member of those sites either, but heard some interesting stories. It's just not my cup of tea.

I'm actually not a big fan of online dating. I don't understand the assumed responsibility that you must email at least three times before you can even ask to meet. That's what it's leading up to, so why not just ask that right away? That's why you "winked" or "poked" or whatever else they're called; because you were interested. Why is the "meeting" such a big elephant in the cyberspace room?

When you meet someone at a grocery store or bar, don't you ask them out right away? I've never been asked for my email address so that we can get to know each other better first. It's usually, "Would like to go out sometime?" I think if a guy asked if he could email me, I'd probably think he was insecure.

Here's one of my favorite "asking out" stories:
I was working at a shoe store one stormy, blizzardy night at a mall near Christmas. It's a little later in the evening and because of the weather no one is in the mall. I had a HUGE test the next day and just wished that I could go home. I was standing at the front of the store (the mall entrance to the store) when over the intercom system they announced that the mall was closing due to the weather. I was SO incredibly excited that, naturally, I did a "happy" dance. A rather elaborate one. When I got through with my celebration, I realized that I also had an audience.

He was a cute guy, resembled Charlie Sheen a little bit. Of course, I was embarrassed. But I just shrugged and walked into the aisles of the store to die of humiliation and straighten up the store for closing.

Then I notice he's walking down the aisle towards me. I thought, great, just great, he's going to say something about my victory dance. But, to my surprise, he asked if I could help him find some shoes. WHAT?! Dude, the mall is closing. You're cute and all, but I want to go home! I don't want to sell anymore shoes to anyone!!!

But, I did. I helped him find a pair of dress shoes and socks. And he left the store! What?! He really wanted shoes? So, I start my closing duties over again. Then he walks back into the store. I thought, great, now what? Shoe polish? A shoe horn? What!

But he asked if he could take me to dinner sometime. I hesitated - only because I was currently unavailable. I went back and forth in my mind. The relationship I was in was near the end anyway (you know the feeling) and what did I have to lose? He was cute and he wears dress shoes. We already had two things in common: eating and wearing dress shoes. So, I said yes.

When we reminisced on the story, he said that he was walking through the mall on the phone with a friend admiring the woman in front of him. His friend said that he should grow a pair and ask her out then. He didn't ask her out, but when he walked past my store, he stopped, started to walk on by, then remembered what his friend said. He turned around and walked into the store, lost a little nerve, and bought a pair of shoes instead (that happens to me all the time!). He kicked himself for not asking me out and so walked back in, and that's when I said yes to dinner and the next two years of my life.

I love stories like that. The meet-cute. The story of how you "got together." I think I need the story to start a relationship. And that's one reason I don't like online dating. You don't get that cute, funny, awkward story of the first time you met or the first time he asked you out.

You can email someone for days, weeks, months and really think you like them, but it only takes a second of spending time with them in public - and you know whether or not you can stand another second. So, I say why waste my time emailing or calling when I can figure it all out with one meeting. Makes sense to me.

But, I get it. Where else do you meet people and know they're single?! You hate the bar scene, you're too busy, all of your friends' friends are married or dating, etc. So, you sign up online. I don't know. I just feel like a casting director when I go on them.

Me, I'm going to wait for the story.

SONG OF THE DAY: "Haven't Met You Yet" by Michael Buble
This is a cute, upbeat song about knowing that there's someone out there that you're going to meet and it's going to be great - but you just haven't met them yet. It's peppy and uplifting, like a hopeful show choir song you'd sing in high school. Maybe a song you could clean the house to and dance with a mop or broom. (You know you've done that.)